blog

2006-11-07T06:54:00.000-08:00

moved! pls relink http://www.xanga.com/thwartedlythwarted (:

2006-10-16T06:10:00.000-07:00

haha acty my maid was sent back almost a week ago, i typed this post then but didnt post it. but i dont wanna let my post go to waste so yes im posting it now. so yeah try to turn back e time abit. heh.

2006-10-16T06:07:00.000-07:00

Life sucks. For people who had talked to me recently, no not cos of eoys. Okay maybe cos of eoys but its not cos of tt tt im blogging now. Life sucks, because of the fact of how two normal people can have such drastically different lives. One can be going to a top school, living in a not bad house, having almost the best education, living life pampered by parents and family while the other struggle going thru much pains just to get a decent job to support her family. In case ur thinking what im talking about, im talking abt my new maid and I.

My new maid got sent back home today. I think shes on her way back to Indonesia now, ytd when she left she cried don’t know how many times. Even my earlier maid who had been with us for 2 yrs didn’t react so greatly. She hugged us, said bye and just practically cried.
Why? Cos she was underaged. Theres this stupid law tt Singapore set last yr tt the minimum age for maids is 23. She was 19, she bluffed her way to Singapore. No one knew, maybe her agent did. Everything went fine, she was ALREADY in Singapore, working with my family when one day, as all other new maids, she was sent for some thumb printing thing to get a work permit. And guess what? She was caught there. The police thought she looked underage and went to interrogate her. In e end she gave in and owned up. She was then given 11 days to settle and leave. And todays e 11th day I think.

Good things never happe for long. She was a very bubbly and cute girl, only 4 yrs older than me. Imagine when I ws born she was only 4. And look at me and her, im like enjoying life minus exams while she was torn away from her family, came overseas to work for people whom she never met before, no one would know what would happen to her here. She was honest, nice and innocent, not as scheming as my earlier one. We liked her, just tt I hadn’t gotten used to her. And before I could shes gone.

Ytd she went up to my grandma’s room, cried so much, I felt so sour. She was really really very pitiful. And it happened tt ytd I was also going thru some crisis of my own, feeling so depressed and sick of life. And then seeing her cry not only made me feel worse but als made me think about my plight and hers. Mine would be over in 2 weeks, and my grades, good or not, is not gonna affect my life in any way. Other than feeling sad and disappointed, but she? She left her family, almost made it, but then, in a moment of diff, shes gonna go home. Emptyhanded.
I was depressed not cos I saw her crying. I was depressed cos I thought of what lies ahead of her. Maybe cos I watched too many drama serials or what, I keep thinking like what if she borrowed money from loansharks? I mean like to come here, e agent paid for her first right, and now she hasn even earn anything and they’re sending her home. Owing the agent is okay but what if like she borrowed from the loansharks or sth. What if she were to go home and get haunted by them. What if she get sold or sth. And also maybe cos poor families in shows have mean fathers, what if she were to go home empty handed nd her parents scold her? I mean like, if they bear to send her off, it means tt they’re desperate for money and determined for her to go work. What would they do if they found out she failed. E more I think e more I feel gross and depressed. I want to help her but what can I do. Its just so ironic, how we complain all day about our lives. But hey, look at hers. Im just suddenly jolted by the fact tt both of us are humans, both teenage girls, and yet im here and shes there. Im sleeping in an air conned room, eating whatever I wanted and doing what I want, while shes washing my clothes, washing my toilet, cooking my food. And e worse thing is, im younger than her, but I have e right to order her around. And she has to listen. OH THIS SUCKS.

I just feel damn depressed by seeing e state shes in. she was crying and crying and guess what she told me when she left? ‘be careful okay? Take care ah, must study ah.’ and when she left she said again ‘must study everyday ah’. I really wanted to cry then, like omg shes leaving and shes still tinking of me. And I guess she hadn’t got e chance to study tts why. But don’t u think it sucks? Look at her, poor 19 yr old teenage going thru so much stress and trauma. Life sucks, life really sucks. Well my lifes gonna rock 2 weeks later, im gonna be happy soon but what abt her? E more I think of what will happen to her, e more I feel worried. don’t ask me why im caring so much abt a girl whom I’ve met only for 1.5 weeks. Maybe its cos during this stressful period, when ur under pressure, ur eyes somehow see things better, ur more aware of whats happening around you. Maybe if it were after exams, when im too obsessed with my own life, caring more abt myself being happy, I wouldn’t be caring much abt her. Maybe cos its now, when im down tt I do. Humans are just so selfish huh? Im selfish.
Argh I don’t know its just saddening to go thru this.

And haha to think I thought we could survive without a maid. Im ard dying today. My clothes, my bowls ahhaah, okay I gotta learn, to stand on my own, before I can go abt worrying for other people isn’t it?

Anyway h***** sucks. “ur grades do not equate to the effort u put in, I don’t care how much effort u put in, im just lookin for potential” thanks bitch, thanks. I know I know, tts e truth, tts how this world works, tts what keep this sucky place turning but e thing is isn’t it too harsh to drill such a stuff so directly to 15yr old girls like us? We know tt, but don’t remind us of tt. And when everyone is so sad and disappointed, you choose to say such a thing? Thanks ur damn sensitive. Look, I put in an effort, my grandma passed away during e sept hols. And I hadto put her death away FAST just to get started on this ss pt. I tried my best and u give me this? And not only didn’t u sound nice, ur telling me tt hardwork doesn pay off? Or ur telling me tt I suck, after all these effort still no quality.

And what ur so insistent on ur stand. Why? Cos u have 15 yrs of teaching experience? Well last time u taught at other schs, now ur teaching at rgs and like u said last time, welcome to our lives. Just like u said, things change, rgs is different from other schs, so u gotta learn tt we have a mind of our own and like to offer u our stand. And being a teacher, u shld learn how to ACCEPT them. Think thru it before u reject it. U have 15 yrs of teaching but u don’t even have 15 months of teaching IN RGS. U wanna talk abt experience, I can say I have more than you when it comes to rgs. I studied here, I belong here, I know things tt go on. And u don’t. so before u decide to give a comment or a grade and state ur stand, think twice.
Im gonna prove to you, tt hardwork DOES pay off. Tts why im mugging now right? Well quality is one thing but quality comes from effort. Im gonna prove to u this fact so much so tt its shoved right into ur mouth and chokes you. Im gonna prove tt hardwork does does does pay off. And when tt time comes, don’t go saying its cos I got such a wonderful teacher life you. Cos from e day u taught us, im on my own.

Anyway I got good news, my mum said tt my maid needn pay the agent cos its their fault, so now shes just going back to her old life, no debts nothing! ((: but I will miss her, 4 yrs later I will wait. Then she can come here (:

2006-10-03T09:28:00.000-07:00

yes just one more post and then i'll go mug. suddenly i have this happy moodswing, so better mug fast when its still there.haha well i was supposed to blog ytd but when i typed a whole lot of shit and click publish post, guess what? ''the page cant be displayed'' wah thanks thanks, i love you so much.but since i didnt feel very comfortable about that post, dont post also nvm. its about how rgs girls have no life and how love is in the eye of the beholder. the rgs girls no life one i think i no need blog people also know, after all people reading this blog mostly rg what. hahaha.but i was telling eileen abt the second topic and felt yes maybe i SHOULD blog abt it.it really amazes me how love can be so blind, so daring and so impossible.three months ago, i went to see a doctor at a nearby clinic. while collecting my medicine, i realised the lady who gave me the medicine (yes my eng sucks, i dont even know whats she called) she looks quite kiam pa. shes erm like u know shes young like 27 but she looks like 37 those kind. plus shes fat, her facial features are squashed together, she looks quite qian bian and put in straight, shes erm abit ugly. yeah and shes short and fat too. okay sounds abit like me:/ (pls don’t think im mean, im just trying to tell you she doesn look good,and im not laughing or mocking at her in any way okay? Look ugly people wont laugh at ugly people (: )but e point is its okay if you dont look pretty its okay. cos if you look good and ur attitude sucks, i wouldnt like you. and if u dont look good but ur nice, i will like you. ahh u get e point. but she, dont look good AND attitude sucks. she looks unfriendly and aquite stuck up, which pisses me off. hello im sick ard okay? show me some love (:yeah and then i was thinking, this kinda person sure cant find someone who loves her (okay as in a boyfriend lah) cos yeah u know what i mean.3 months later, yesterday, i was at the clinic again and then i saw her again.same old look, as qiam pa as ever, still unfriendly, still fat. and i was still looking at her when she walked out from behind the counter. what i saw next literally made me stone and stare for quite a few seconds......... SHE IS PREGNANT!okay like i tld eileen, thinking in a conventional way, if shes pregnant means shes married. and e irony is that 3 months ago i was still saying she wont even get a stead. and now shes pregnant, as in really big ard her stomach. or else how i can see right? shes so fat.and the funny thing is, eileen pointed out to me that, this means that when i met her 3 months ago, SHE WAS ARD PREGNANT. and i was still thinking shes single. but yu know what? i didnt manage to think this way tt time. i stll thought i was right 3 months ago and that she WAS acty single, but i forgot e fact how impossible for her to stead, get married, conceive a baby that looked like its ard 6 months, in just 3 months. yes thats e extent of my stupidity. when eileen told me then i ''oh yeah hor! means tt time shes ard pregnant''maybe you dont get whats e big deal about this but as in i just wanted to show how wrong someone can be about someone else. from single to being a mother. hahaha how wrong i can be. i was still thinking she wouldnt date anytime soon! but its comforting to know that love really is in the eyes of the beholder. love can be so blind.and it comforts me to know that love still exists in the absence of good looks, good bod and all the superficial stuff.and this brings me to another point that i also asked eileen. you see right, most of us now, we crush people cos of their looks or their talent or whatever, but seldom truly by their character. so that most prolly isnt true love. then if you walk along te streets, you will realise many couples, both not very good looking, but they look so close together. then they should be together for who they are and not how they look like. so does that mean true love is really regardless of looks and purely on character? or could you say you cant explain true love, since even the meanest people on earth date. as in someone loves them. so i asked eileen what exactly is true love. if what ur experiencing is true love, does it mean that if someone were to ask you why you love her, you wouldn be able to reply. cos thats love?hahah what is this man, some philosophy of love. hahaha but as in its true, dont you think so, you dont love for looks, you dont love for character, then what is your love for someone based on? okay exclude all those superficial stuff like fame and money, come on even normal people along the streets get married. okay thats based on the assumption that they marry cos of true love lah.omg okay im getting confused. okay bye.

2006-09-25T06:44:00.000-07:00

HADY WON. yes let me hear you say! HADY MIRZA! hahaha

i was still abit shocked when the results were announced. i thought jon will win. and im not as happy as last year. cos i do like jon too. as in he deserves to be the singapore idol too. not like sly tt shit ass. (: but yeah like i said to amelia, i do prefer hady still (((:

well u could say that jon got e star quality and can switch to the chi industry anytime. AND he can go into acting too. yes, but all these can be done as a runnerup too. but for the singapore idol, i think yes hady. well runnerups always go further than e winner, with sylvester e shit-ass as an exception. tt loser dare claim that "i heard tt people say jon is e me in this season" oh kiss my ass! come on, jon got more intellectual, more style more SUBSTANCE than you, not someone tt knows just how to wear PINK EMO SPECS, acts like a CHOU AH BENG, and gets into some marriage shit or sth if im not wrong right? yeah and not only was his contract not continued, it was cut! like e manager didnt even wait for it to end. tell me, WHAT KINDA LOSER IS TT? and where is he now? yeah in s'pore i know, tts wnat my dad said haha, but hes singing in some pub lounge now, like loser?! can you live up to the singapore idol runner-up title?!

haha okay why im talking about him but yes, i feel happy for hady but a lil sad for jon. and why is ken still so mean to hady! still say tt kinda thing when he win. and can tell gurmit singh all these people like jon, they keep mentioning him, but yeah lah he deserves to be mentioned, cos hes good. not like sly, e moment taufik's name was announced hes kicked to e back of e stage where no one gives a damn whats his name. HAHA!

hahaha today's show was much nicer than ytd's. e top 10 finalists' performance rock, except joakim's as usual. like comeon, even recorded still suck! like damn thwarted?! haha all he does is jump around e stage like a monkey. wah hes damn ýin shui si yuan' which means drink water think of its source, which also means erm not forgetting one's origin. joakim sure hasn forgotten man's ancestor, THE MONKEY, wait, is it monkey or ape? aiya same lah.

and energy sucks. their own song was erm okay, but their stand by me really cmi. lucky hady and jon saved it man. it was quite off loh.

and i realised we havent seen taufik for so long ard! i missed his first song, haha, but hes still as cool huh, acty i think he looks better than hady. but he seem to detached from si now, from e audience, the judges and gurmit singh. but his announcement of si was more climatic than hady's. and if im notm wrong, sly didnt come right? haha he shldn, no one wants a freaking poser on national television. haah but i think taufik's still as cool.

hmm what else, nothing ard lah.but whatever it is, yay that hady won. though its abit shocking and not as hong dong. hady didnt like dislocate his jaw and let it drop and like didnt cry or anything. they didnt show his mum! as in other than the scene where both mums and dads hug. so sweet, racial harmony (: and all e best for jon too, hes as much deserving as hady. but i still prefer hady. but good luck to jon too. ahaha

today's such an eventful day! haha and tmr's tues! slack day! and i didnt mug but nvm its worth it. (: yay and next its the dancefloor. hahah i like so you think you can dance better. and no more si for the next 2 yrs pls, or else people will get sick or it.

yup but yes, today's a happy day. minus tt disgusting coldsore on my lip. but yes, happy. H-A-P-P-Y! hahaah so spastic but nvm. hahaha and i cant post this now, i finally got conected to e internet and while typing this halfway i got cut off so im lke typing this on e internet window which is like disconnected from the internet ard.so cant post or everything gone. lol like how thwarted is that?!

2006-09-24T01:39:00.000-07:00

i am sometimes quite amused at my stupidity.

monday (tmr) is my geog test so on fri, before i left the class, i specially took out my geog file from underneath my desk and put it in my locker, so that i can collect it on sat when im in sch cos e classroom is locked.

so yes, i did. on sat i collected my file and went home to sleep bfore mugging. and then i woke up, okay start mugging. and i realised i felt my geog testbook under my desk! wth. textbook more impt than file and yet i left it under my desk. and to think when i was taking my geog file out, i saw my geog textbook and even thoguht 'geog textbook'in my ming. and then i closed it without realising hey its GEOG textbook. like thwarted?!

okay thats not all. thinking tt i can borrow e textbook later at night from someone else, i took out my file to read e notes inside first. dont waste time right? and i reaslied that i havent filed my weathering notes into my geog file yet! they're still in my normal file, which i bring home EVERYDAY AND IS WITH ME RIGHT NOW AS WELL. wth, things tt shld bring home didnt bringe, and things tt i shldn bring home, i brought it home! i dont even need my geog file now! and i still have to lug it back to sch. wah thanks man. this is how thwarted i am. its either cos im a thwart tts why i call myself thwart, or its cos i call myself thwart and now im becoming one. ass!

and now im still unsure about weathering. everything tt needs to be studied ard studied, yet i dont know if its enough. ______ never told us anything! and she better mark our test properly this time, since its conventional marking and everything is standard. dont go say cos i didnt phrase is this way so u dont give me mark for thi point. i swear i will pull her usual two big ring earrings until her ears reach her shoulders. i miss mrs C.A.N! can she come back soon!

2006-09-15T08:13:00.000-07:00

so many things happened these past few day! im so gonna blog about it (:

thursday
I SWEAR NEVER TO SKIP MEALS AGAIN, well at least lunch and dinner. i had e second worse gastric of my life on thursday ( e worse was a saturday few months ago. that was HELL.) yeah what happened? cos i stupidly ate a heavy recess, so by lunch i was still full. plus geog is after lunch and i havent done e FA tt mrs ______ wanted us to do. and since shes been pmsing real bad these days, of course i havta do right? like thwarted lah. so i skipped lunch.

schoold ended at 3 and i bought lunch, and brought it to e clc, well mr chu allowed us to eat (: so i ate. and then half an hr later i felt a light pain in my stomach. at first i thought it was just a tummyache so i went to shit right? like thwarted? and then it got worse and i had to squat at the corridor outside clc for 20 plus min. then i went back in, wah really cmi, nattay said i was pale then and then nice nice ping fang, kevy, jia, nattay, yityng, and some others helped me get some hot water thingto put on my stomach. after vommitting 3 times, one in the toilet, twice in plastic bags, i got better.

but omg, i swear swear never to skip meals again. if need to, i will skip recess not lunch. so people remind me okay? i dont wanna get a gastric ever again. it sucks big time.

friday
ahhahaha im very very happy today! well nearing the end more like it. well today's the rehearshals of the youth science conference tmr and its also e judging round for poster presentations! well though we all say we dont mind getting nothing, we do midn right?

yeah and our q and a was screwed, to us at least, cos they asked qsns and stuff tt i neevr even knew exist. so yeah basically we thoguht we will get nothing, though secretly we still hope for distinction but we could just aim for merit. so scary right? okay thwarted lah.

and then, when they were announcing the distinction winners, they started with cat a, we're C7. then e lady was announcing, then from a she jumped to C. but C 12, 16, 22, sth like tt. so its like skipped us right? so no hope right? but its like, cat B cant possibly have no distinctions what, so i still hope maybe they'll get back to us. but no, they went on to E. and slowly, from e fast fast heatrbeat, i become no longer nervous, like lose hope ard what. like thwarted?! ard at e, what u think? then next it goes like this

lady: wair we missed some grps
*grabs isa's hand*
lady: in the cat B
*loosens hand and lose hope again*
lady: b... C4
*grabs hand again*
lady: C7.

omg miracles do happen in life, really. we didnt epect ourselves to even get merit, much less distinction, plus they ard went on to E ard! like wth?! i love life (: we were so happy, we smiled all e way from our seat to the stage HAHAHA. i love life, i love smp, omg i love everybody. now i truly understand that grades really ARENT everything. they're sth but not eevrything. its like, wheni do well in a test, its like 'yay' and then? it dies off. but this, omg it lasts, i smiled all e way from clementi back home (well on and off lah) omg isnt life so damn wonderful? plus ss pt postponed to fri!

haha okay tts what i say now, when sth else sucks again, i will start cursing life. but for now, let me love life. hahaha its been so long since i was this happy, seriosuly. hhahahaha i just cant stop laughing.

oh and sth else to digress, was talking to kovan kok, and he was telling me how disappointed dear CHRISTIAN HENG was. but the thing is, you, fat ass pig, didnt even do much for the prog, and u expect to get sth?! lile thwarted? and worse, kovan told me he was sad also because he COULDNT BELIEVE WE WERE BETTER THAN HIM, or at leas put more effort than him. lke its almost equivalent to me walking up to a 180cm man and telling him i cant believe im shorter than him. or telling miss universe i cant believe im not prettier than her. see the relevance? i mean, not tt im being ego, but even kovan agrees christian heng slacks.

and COME ON, u cant always indulge in the fact that guys are better in science than girls. okay tt may be true, but a guy like u? with the amt of effort u put in? in e first place, oh wait, are u even a guy? when i first saw you, i thought u were a pig who deformed and looked like a human. pardon me for being so mean, but i've had enough of this ass-shit egoistic guy erm pig? i dont know, blame my limited vocab.

oh and let me remind you, CHRISTIAN HENG, you gotta stop this. your ego is so BIG, then even you, such a big fat ass, cant take it okay? well if you say isa and i dont look good, trsut me, you dont look much better either. dont get me wrong, im not trying to spite you cos u said im ugly. but its a fact, anybody who wants to know how he looks like, tell me. i bet no one in this world, apart from his mum, thinks he looks good. and if u dont look good but ur good at heart, trust me, people will love you. but YOU, no looks no character, a real human/pig tragedy. okay? like thwarted?! you are ugly, probably one of the ugliest people i've met, both inside and out, honest (: today's honesty day. and worse, ur egoistic, ur ugly but you act like ur freaking handsome and hot. its okay to say we're ugly, but dont make it sound like ur handsome. much less to say, hot. and now, you think ur better than us in this proj? like *knocks on ur empty head* (echo...) thwarted?! dude, you gotta wake up from this wonderful fantastic world that you live in, where even dumb asses like you are handsome and smart. okay? cos truth is, ur not. so dude, wake up. stop living in that world or u'll never grow up. well u can choose not to, but when u go rj, good luck friend! girls will laugh at you, and guys will hate you (: thats life.

p.s im not mean, im acty a nice girl with sweet character (: well its tell a lie day now. okay but i really dont insult people just anyhow like tt, but this guy er man er pig, has really tested my patience. i tolerated seeing you once every week, one whole week during the june hols and beared with ur act shuai-ness and all tt. and now your sad cos u thikn you are better than us? oh a piece of advice, go eat your stinky ass s__t okay? okay good night for now (:

2006-09-13T05:40:00.000-07:00

haha i realised i havent been replying to the tags so yeah shall reply now. but dont laugh if im replying to people tt tagged like long long ago ahah. er what im talking about? ah dont know.

haha to eileen, zeslene, nattay <3, peiqi, latha, thwart, char i think tts all right? haha yup thanks for consoling me when i was down during the hols haha. haha kevy, did you hear the mai hum podcast?! hahaha so sexy!!! and to thwart again, u shrugger, u made me think of this qsn one okay, like thwarted?! to carmen, haha omg i didnt expect you to come to my blog! hahaha i thought u didnt even know me hahaha! oh well okay nvm. and tammy hello!

sorry, now u know why i dont wanna reply to tags. COS I SUCK. i dont know what to reply! then if i dont reply, then stupid thwart start saying me again. wait is it her? i dont know haha cant rmb. so see ah, i replied dont say i didnt.

anyway, bird just came out with a new shrugs word! song4 jian1! haha in chinese. and in tamil its erm theriyalae. hahhaa so cool right! imagine u shrug and say tt at e same time, plus a lil head shake. ((:

and today we had this survey thing, and yeah right, survey was just a word they use to make it sound like nothing. its a test. and i got math. gosh i forgot half of the stuff inside there, like factors, similarity and blah blah lah. and also cos i didnt bother to do, hello, they didnt allow calculators! after 3 years with tt good buddy of mine, u tell me i cant use it? i almost forgot how to add and subtract using the manual way :/ and then we had this IQ test, we had to finish 30 qsns in 15min. it was super easy! okay pls say tt its cos im smart (: and not cos its really easy. and to think i said 'i no IQ one leh' when i found out it was an iq test, ying ching heard it damn. haha. and back track abit.

today mrs ______ pmsed very badly! one and a half hours! as in, some things she said made sense, and i do agree, but she should try another approach, as in the way she speak ah, even if ur wrong u wont wanna admit.

what else? hmm this entry seem very narrative of my day, which is NOT GOOD. its supposed to be a blog to be used whenever sth unusual happens. now its so narrative. aiya whatever lah. and wth i just saw singapore idol and they showed sji. lol even sji has a proper concert theatre. even sji has a nicer theatre! now tell me, its nothing about ri or acsi being e exceptionally rich ones. i think rgs is the exceptionally no money one. dont say poor, not nice lah. haha. okay nothing already lah. bye

2006-09-09T10:10:00.000-07:00

im back.in a much better mood now, im slowly getting over it, though when sundays come and when i step into 'ah nae jia' i will like get sad again. like shrugs?!?! so thwarted right? but well, at least my math is more or less done, and tmr i will be chionging my pts. so yes i can do this (:

well im blogging cos thwarted made me blog again. i was talking to her then she suddenly asked me if she shld go rj.
i told her that of course as weiting i would want her to go rj cos yeah shes my thwart i wanna be in same sch as her right?! but in fact, i think she shldn go. or maybe, i want her to go cos im going but... in e first place shld i go? gerrit?!

like, everytime im faced with this qsn, im always stuck. as in, well yeah being in rgs and loving raffles so much, i shld go to rj right? and since rj is like one of the (or THE) top jc in s'pore, plus im guaranteed a seat there, why not? but i dont want. like so thwarted?! humans are neevr contented.

but hey, not tt im greedy or what, but likerr, rj kinda sucks?! no offence, dont go like remember my name and make life hell for me when i go rj. but frankly, people always say rj girls are bitches, whcih i kinda agree? cos rj come from rg and from what i see, yeah rgs girls are like quite bitch? okay compared to other schs not so. but still. rj sucks, thats what seniors coming back from there say. RJ SUCKS, DONT GO THERE. they alwys say e same thing.

i still rmb at psltc, someone asked carmen how is rj. she said it sucks, not cos of the work, e work is manageable. its the people. why? well cos when people go rj, when they meet the opposite sex, they change. 'what about ur good friends leh?' 'all change loh' like so shrugs right?! even ur closest friends change. sometimes myabe ur e one changing. its inevitable lah, i mean, when ur put togehter with guys after like how many decades, yeah people get excited. shrugs, but e prob is rj guys come from ri, like ri?! thwarted lah.

and she said sth quite erm inspiring? not that word, but like e kinda feeling that her sentence make sense. 'secondary sch is when u create friednships, jc is when you test ur friendships; if ur friendship can last past jc, it will last for e rest of ur life'. its very true isnt it? people hate jc cos their friends change, e people start sucking, not cos of the workload or stuff.

hmm but if thats e case, then every jc is e same what, cos everyone will change, cos hello there're so many single sex schx in s'pore, not just ri and rgs. so you would start asking me, why do u not like rj then?

now i dont know how to answer, except LIKERR, RJ SUCKS?! it still sucks. right? who cares whether other jcs are like tt not, but when rg girls change, they're scary. so life's gonna suck. and i've already identified so many of my close friends now who are potential 'huge changers' in jc. i think i would spend half my life in jc puking in disgust then acty studying. but on the other hand, i may be the one changing. shrugs, im going on forever.

thwarted also said sth else 'but if i dont go rj, dont go hcjc, then no more jcs good ard' thats also very true. if im so picky and not wanna go rj, where else can i go? poly? well thats what i wanted at first but eileen said poly will slacken u down. then where man. shrugs. talk so much still back to square one, so shld i just 'follow the crowd' and just go jc? i dont know lah.

2006-09-05T04:08:00.000-07:00

things just have to end this way. well 2nd to 4th sept was psltc, a much awaited camp for me and e rest of the spsls, cos its our first and last eevr camp as seniors as organisers. so as im in prog comm, i will anticipate it more right?

satrday was fun but it was sunday i was waiting for. waking up in the morning, though tired and all tt stuff, i was much anticipating urban hike in the afternoon. sun was e best day of the camp, with morn training, afternoon urban hike and whole night's of dinner and bath time and movie, what more cn u ask for from a training camp? furthermore, i was a station misstressm no need to run, just sit outside gramaphone and stone. somemore i will e wearing the thwarted shirt that i and xian made! yea so i waoke up in the morn, feeling excited feeling happy. i was even thinking on the kind food i shld buy at taka, the things i shld do and what kinda movie gramaphone would be playing that day.

sunday seemed such a fun day to me, but no it wasn. i was in the clc having training when lynette came in and told me my dad was here to see me about family matters. initially i thought it was like maybe some kinda quarrel or sth. but when i went out, sth dawned on me, my grandma.

and soon before i could react, my dad was like 'ah nae(my maternal grandma) passed away.' my grandma had been suffering from cancer (yes damned cancer that also took away my third aunt) but this news just seem too sudden to me. and to think i stoned for a few seconds and even asked mym dad if he was kidding. like wth?! then i went back in to the clc, told miss low about it, went to block j pack up my stuff then finally broke down. thoguh everyone was around hugging me, it still hurt, cos its inside and not e outside.

then still half unabke to accept what has exactly happened, i went to e hospital.
i dont know why im blogging this, maybe i just wanted to say this somewhere or what. but it seemed like just moments ago when my aunt passed away due to cancer too. looking into the coffin of my grandma, it seemed like ytd that i was looking into my aunt's. 2 years, 2 years its only been two years and i lost 2 of my family members to the damned damned cancer. like wth is cancer man. can someone find a cure to it? but maybe by that time, sth else will pop up again. damned.

sunday wasn that a wonderful day after all. i lost mny grandma. can u see the difference? from eating prata sausage roll and shaking leg at taka enjoying life, i lost my grandma. and looking at her pics on the slideshow,its still hard to believe shes really gone. everyone was there at the wake, but it still felt that somneone was missing. i guess im expecting my grandma to turn up, forgetting the fact that its her funeral.

looks like the thwarted ipod game did make sense when i asked e qsn what was install for me thi weekend : 'f**k it'

and then on monday i wnet back to camp for badge initiation some weird things happened, like thwart dropped e whole box containing e spsl badges. everyone else's badges were fine except mine got seveely bent. yeah thwarted right? like thwarted?!?!?!

and then i met some 305ers who came back to prac for netball carn. all of them just said hi to me, smieled like nothing happened and stuff. it suddenly dawned on me the amusing fact that no matter how great or drastic sth can happen to one person, everyone else still live life as normal. im not saying my friends are not concerned lah! they didnt know. but as in its at this point of time that i suddenly realise that three words can really describe life :it goes on. cliched as it may sound right, but yeah, u can cry u can laugh u can go knock ur head against the wall and everyone else around u, everything around goes on as usual. argh my eng is kinda broken lah but who cares, not like i can improve it or what. but yes its indeed ironic how life can turn out to be how things can change from heaven to hell, hpw unpredictable or true small lil things are or how life just operates on its own, with no regard whether u like it or not. ur part of life, or maybe ur a life urself but the world doesn really care does it?

gosh i sound abit emo right? i dont know lah. but i will definitely miss my grandma no matter what, be it her, her delicious food, her voice, her courage, her love, or even the playing of the songs of her favourite singer fei yu qing. i will miss her, very very much. but i guess life goes on, it does. all i can do now i think, is just to tresure the last moments with her, the memories she left behind and then move on with life.

2006-09-01T09:58:00.000-07:00

LOL. i was feeling bored while waiting for eileen to send me e smp poster, so i went blog surfing! didnt want to sleep cos i dont want e same thing to happen again! wake up in e morn and realise everything forgot to do. yes so i was blogging and decided to go to thwart's blog. thwart is zhi xian the big loser ass. yes and then she played this game and saboed me to do it too. haha since im bored then all e better lah, but THWART, CAN U STOP BEING SO THWARTED AND DO THESE THWART STUFF? SHRUGS MAN THWART!

okay here goes:
1) put ur music player on shuffle
2)press forward for each question
3)use the song title as the answer for ur qsn, even if it doesnt make sense
4)tag 5 other people
5)bold the questions and the the answers and give ur own comments o.O

how are you feeling today?
accidentally in love

ah? no, im not thinking of elvin ng or the hyun bin. (: hahaha aiya whateevr lah.

will u get far in life?
一千年以后 (yiqian nian yi hou means one thousand years later)

WAH THANKS MAN WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN HUH?!

how do your friends see u?
怎样 (zen yang means er how?)

i also dont know, HOW? -_-

will you get married?
对不起，我爱你（dui bu qi wo ai ni means sorry i love u)

thwarted?!

what is your best friend's theme song?
恋爱达人 (lian ai da ren er i dont know how to translate)

hahaha this is so true man. someone will understand (:

what is the story of ur life?
now that she's gone

ah? i really dont get it, more like now thats he's gone right? aiya whatever.

what was primary school like?
听不懂没关系（ting bu dong mei guan xi er means dont understand, nvm LOL what kinda translation is this)

hahaa i also dont understand. maybe telling me er, dont understand nvm? but understand what!?

how can you get ahead in life?
爱的就是你 (ai de jiu shi ni means er the one i love is you?)

gosh what game is this, doesn make sense, okay thats what its all about right.

what is the best thing about your friends?
精灵 ( jing ling is er elf?)

haha nvm i will take it that it means that my friends are like angel? *pukes* look at thwart, shes angel?! haha joking, thwart.

what is in stall for this weekend?
f**k it

omg of all songs. this weekend is psltc leh! its something fun leh wth. how can! and dont ask me why i got this song, thwart sent it to me. okay fine cos i asked for it but cos e song's nice not e lyrics lah.

what song describes you?
害怕 (hai pa means scared)

haha this seems to be the most 'make sense' answer so far, thoguh im not scared? just frustrated? idont know lah.

to describe your grandparents?
美丽的神话（mei li de shen hua erm its myth in english actually)

haha WOW. so romantic.

how is your life going?
on my way

er on my way where man? haha too bad i dont have a song 'screwed'.

how does the world see you?
tonight i feel close to you

wow will i be some president of the world next time? or ambassador of earth to outer space? well u never know maybe by the time i grow up we can communicate with aliens. (:

will you have a happy life?
骑士的精神 (qi shi de jing shen argh i dont know how to translate, rider's sprit? o.O)

er does this mean i have a life like a rider? then whats a rider like? lol like thwart's jacelyn?

what does your friend really think of you?
racial harmony day song?!

ah? u know i really thnik i will be the ambassador of world peace or something.

do people secretly lust after you?
嫁给我 (jia gei wo means marry me)

wah good sign hor! lol fat hope man.

how can i make myself happy?
you gotta know

true true??

what should you do with your life?
someone

i dont know lah.

will you ever have children?
命运 (ming yun = fate)

ah? dont know also.

okay now its tagging time. i dont know leh, who ah?
nattay! <3
ame
arathi (since you're always here haha)
kok (dont kill me ah, let you have pastime)
kevyna!!

yup done time to sleep.

2006-08-29T06:57:00.000-07:00

dont read, cos what im gonna say will just be purely rantings and whatever shit, so dont bother reading.

oh freak man, what is happening to me now!! its just a simple thing, a simple ______ what, why am i not being myself!!! why is it that after this thing has happened, i cant concentrate on what im doing! worse for the first 5 min after it, i was shaking lah wth?! my hand was shaking?! then im like gonged about what is going on around me, like i went to my dad's room, watched e tv but am absorbing nothing, look at my bro sleep and wish i could sleep as well, no one's online for me to tell this thing too, people whom i can tell are busy and tired now i dont wanna disturb them. after all, this is big thing to me but to e tohers its nothing what. ahhh then no one to talk to, cant get to sleep, cant watch tv, and stupid my lovely samsoon is still not on yet, i got practically nothing to get this off my mind. and then im gonna sleep, and im afraid i cant! ahh wth, what is happening man!!

blah blah, this is so shit. what exactly is this man? obsession? crush? or just one of the cycles of the cliched 'teenage transition of life'? what is this, its just only ___ whats the big deal!! why am i getting so uneasy about this ah. wth why ah, omg, what am i talking abt?! ah? shit lah what is this man, omg im going crazy.

2006-08-27T06:00:00.000-07:00

I LOVE 209'05. and i miss them very much too.

dont ask me why this sudden random post, blogs are for people to rant at the randomest moments what.

i was online just now, feeling bored and stuff. hello, i stayed home the whole of sunday, mind you. all my plans for sunday all cancelled. visit my grandma, go for ticket selling, cut hair etc. all cancelled. why? cos of my FREAKING SINUS. and now im waiting beside the phone, for eileen to call, half bored to tears and half thiking about tmr, about the eng expo and A LIL BIT ABT ___ ____. yes but thats not e point, the point is im bored and i was looking thru my msn contact list for fun, clicking on each person's dp and looking at it. and then i was looking at latha's dp when suddenly it changed to a 209 pic. then i looked up and saw ruiling's dp, also a 209 pic. and then it dawned on me that something so normal acty meant something. 209 still stayed in their hearts too. as in like every day, i would see niners having some 209 pic on their dp, like rachel ong, wanxin, and others. i myself too used to put 209 as my dp, till elvin ng came into e pic. haha dont get me wrong it doesn mean that he is more impt than 209 HE NEVER WILL. and day after day, i will just look at their dp of 209 without realising that HEY THEY STILL PUT 209 PICS AS THEIR DP! AFTER SEPARATING FOR SO LONG!

maybe im slow or what, but yes, only now RIGHT NOW at 9.00pm (omg its also nine!) did i realise after looking at latha's dp that hey, niners didnt drift apart like i thought it did, if so, niners wouldnt be putting 209 pics as their dp. okay u may say that cos it looks nice and stuff but hey it looks nice! THEY THINK IT LOOKS NICE. and they bother to 'click' 'change my display picture' 'browse' and select a 209 pic and then click 'ok'! at least they bothered. i dont know why, it culd be e same old moodswing again but once again i felt that im not e only one still thinking of 209, other niners are, and that made me miss and love and think abt 209 more. i love 209 i truly do. people could say its that i 'fang bu xia' (cant let things go) and not that i love 209 but THATS WHAT U THINK. in life, not everything u shld just put down and move on, not everyone must be 'na de qi fang de xia' some things u do have to hold on, well if it matters to u. and to me, 209 matters, its not that i take things too hard and die die dont wanna let go, its cos i dont see why i shld let go of 209, i seriously dont see why. people always say 'jiu de bu qu, xin de bu lai' but i dont see how loving 209 means that i dont like 305, or that being in 305 means that i have to let go of 209. right? yes.

this feeling came to me on andrea's bday too. 7-8 niners were waiting outside of her classroom for her to come. when i saw the whole grp of them, e nine feeling immediately came back, i didnt feel out of place, i didnt feel awkward, i didnt feel im stranger to them, immediately, i felt like i have never left 209, or that 209 have never left me.

and to think i thought i have gotten over 209, BIG MISTAKE. i hadnt. seriously i dont know why im going on and on abt 209 when i dont think any niners are reading this but hey I LOVE 209. and just saying this alone could take me forever, cos i will never get tired. I LOVE 209 I LOVE 209 I LOVE 209 I LOVE 209 I LOVE 209 I LOVE 209 I LOVE 209 I LOVE 209 I LOVE 209. nine times. i said it nine times and im most prolly gonna say it many times later but since it is my eng expo tmr and its 35% and my eng sucks so i better buck up, i shal stop now.

209, I LOVE YOU <3 ((((:

2006-08-26T08:34:00.000-07:00

why is it always when i've gone through a stressed week/ period and i want to have a good rest and then i have to fall sick?

well this week was quite shit, i had chi pt presentation, chi pt indiv, eng oral, failed firelighting and passed it again which means i had 2 times of firelighting a week (that can kill) and a whole lot of stuff. not saying that things are shit, all my things went well. chi pt presentation was enjoyable(: well people laughed and i think that was our best run thru yup i like our chi pt (: and then orals was okay just that i made mistakes and could feel my butt shaking i dont know why. firelighting i passed! hahaha so yeah i dont know why but i just felt this week to be both physically and mentally tiring. and just when i got home on friday, slept till saturday and thought i could have a good enjoyble weekend, i had to fall ill. not really sick but u know my nose 'synus' (wrong spelling) came again after one bloody ass sneeze. those kind like, ur nose keeps running and then suddenly u have this sour feeling in ur nose and u start tearing. then u rub ur nose rub and rub till it turns sore and u sniff and sniff till u have a headache? yeah sucks. AND MY COLDSORE IS RETURNING. i was still wondering, that whenevr im stressed my coldsore would come out but why this time dont have? HAH say too early see lah no have ard. damn ugly lah and pain too.

damn cant i have a good weekend? to sleep to watch tv to rest? and this nose and my mouth havta come bother me. damn. zdothjesrthver this is damn irritating. im like typing and sniffing at e same time. okay fine end.

2006-08-16T05:47:00.000-07:00

yo! hahaha just a random post. its like this, whenever i meet with something tt seems exciting to me, i will wanna tell someone. but that thing is usually not very significant to others. furthermore, there was no one online to tell to so yes this is where my blog comes into picture. gosh i sound damn loser dont i? like happy also got no one to tell.

okay firstly, hmmm e exciting thing tt happened, those readng this (if any) pls dont get disappointed cos its really stupid.
JJ is in s'pore!! okay and also e fact tt he appeared on tv. okay just e fact tt he popped up without me expecting him. like it always happens, when u like a celeb, he will never appear often on tv, lifes like this, its always against ur will. so yeah its hard to find ur fav on tv. and needless to say JJ lin?! like a singer who is always permanently not in s'pore, all e more no shows, no videos nothing to see about him. and then suddenly, while watching singapore idol, he got interviewed!its like watch watch watch, then suddenly, his big fat face is like boom on the screen. like suddenly?! and its been so long since i saw him on tv and stuff, except tt i do sometimes dream lah, okay DONT LAUGH, just normal dream lah like he pop out and stuff, not my fault right! yeah so its like this sudden uptight 'omg' then like omg omg i feel like telling someone, but i dont know whos e someone, then like wanna tell someone but no one. those kinda feeling? then just keep watching e tv and looking at him. and yeah after feeling excited, what comes next? thoughts. i mean eevrything sure u got comments right, especially things u care for. like last time love @ 0 degrees got so many comments wanna say out but no one to say to so u blog! and omg lah, see him few seconds 'eh he looks quite good leh' few more seconds, 'not really lah' another few more seconds' ee quite ugly lah' like e more u look hes not tt wonderful anymore. and omg he looks like mr cheah in certain angles, u know e com studs teach last yr? and he looks like al..... t... i better not say or else get into trouble again. and both guys know him! oh what is this man? is it like cos people who lok alike tend to know each other or hes so influential until they look like him? aiya dont know lah.

but his accent sucks! its damn bloody obvious he doesn speak like tt. like i mean a normal singaporean doesn speak like tt pls? much less a singaporean like him, born and breed here, never once spending his life in e ang moh countries (i think) and he sings chinese songs, yes lah hes from acsi but i dont think accent will be tt strong? my cousin doesn speak tt way. and look at kit chan! someone so pro like her also dont have such a strong accent. and wth, i dont eevn think its a ang moh accent. its a act seh accent right? yes right.

ah i dont know why i like tt lah, i like him! but aiya he really got things to pick on. like pls for goodness sake, u need to speak proper english but no need to fake till like tt right?

haha yes tts all for JJ. but its still amazing dont u think? like a star like him sit among e people. and i think e person beside him knows him. but e camera dont show his face! but aiya JJ is in s'pore leh! hhaha. okay whatever.

then i was watching e tv, then i suddnely got this moodswing, good one. as in i suddenly felt happy. i felt like so bouncy so happy, feel like just smiling and laughing it out. like life felt so wonderful. i feel like hugginh someone! then i thought of nat and char, and realise tmr they are leaving. damn! im gonna count down, come back faster!

hahaha this post is totally random, and i need to do chinese now! wah great okay bye.

2006-08-09T08:35:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE!

haha okay this may sound abit cheesy and geeky but what else can i say? hey she gave me FOUR days of holiday mind you. i should show some appreciation (:

well national day was fun, just that i didnt get to go stadium watch rg guides! but nvm like yen said 'zhi dao wo men zai jiu hao' screw tt stupid camera man lah.

oh and digress abit, today when i was about to leave my cousin's house, i saw an old couple sitting in the park. its like its dark and no one around, then two old people just sit there and stone. e man was chewing sth and e ah ma was stoning. haha though they didnt talk but haha i thought it was very cute. like so old already still go out sit together. sometimes its great to realise how simple things in life can just make life so much more worth living. haha omg what is this man? philosophy? or qing jing zuo wen ah haha im getting too emo.

but haha yeah national day! the performance was quite nice, though i still walked off halfway. and i have to admit for once that yes lah vincent ng is quite hot. and i only say QUITE so kok if u see this, dont get too happy (: haha. elvin ng is still the hottest. but vicent ng is only shuai backstage loh, when he was in normal clothes and teaching the kids their stuff. e moment i saw him in his costume, aiya all gone. back to my initial impression of him as a poser. sorry kok.

and kaira gong is pretty (did i spell her name correctly?) wah when she was in that white gown, hahahah i think SK jewellery can get a third dai yan ren already. sorry lah im not sure of the eng word. haha but she looked damn chio! but when e news showed her backstage, u can see all the erm i dont know whats tt called but aiya u can see her not so nice skin.

okay lah i dont know why im blogging now. but haha happy birthday singapore lah. (:

2006-07-21T06:40:00.000-07:00

AH CANNOT CANNOT!

elvin ng cannot go with rui en! no no NOR?! sorry i just cant take seeing elvin ng in e cliched mushy scenario. like walking along e beach, someone runs past, KNOCK THEM, and opps they fall down together. at least e director was not dumb/cruel enough to go make them kiss as they fall. wah then i will really faint.

its like half laughing half crying lah, at how stupid e show is, but how elvin ng is getting closer to rui en! cannot cannot cannot! cant he stay single? like julian go with rui en, then felicia go with tt other guy or just get hooked on another rich ass or something. then elvin can go be alone.

ah! now he is saying more disgusting things to her! acty its not disgusting. if it were another guy saying to the girl i thought it would be sweet. but elvin ng leh, my elvin ng ): okay i shant say mine. so gross. haha this entry is purely random. (:

2006-07-20T06:26:00.000-07:00

I AM FREAKING AMUSED/PISSED/SHOCKED. i dont know i just dont understand how a 15 yr old RGS girl can be so immature to think that her classmate would do something so immature. seriously.

well today during math, e teacher wanted to give us sweets for our improvement in e last math test. so he passed e bag of sweets around and each of one took one. and then before i knew it i saw e bag on my table. so i took one sweet out and thinking that my tablemates had taken too i passed it behind. i swear thats what i thought, like DUH, shes always taking e things first what. as in not in a bad way, but its a habit, then she would pass it to me.

then few minutes later, she realised that she didnt get e sweet and guess what? she thought i PURPOSELY passed back after i took mine. like WHY WOULD I DO THAT?! cos we're daoing each other now? come on, would i be that immature to do such things? please dont say yes. well daoing someone is already very tiring, would i have anymore energy to go think of ways to zheng her? even if i had, come on, theres so many things i can do rather than DEPRIVE HER OF A SWEET?! but dont get me wrong im not gonna do anything to her, in case she start accusing me again o.O

and this brings me to my next thing. she went to talk to shara,asking her where is e sweet and told her 'next time if theres anything, pass it to e centre, or someone will just pass it down' i will remember this sentence forever man. when i heard this i was so shocked that i didnt know how to react. i wanted to ask her what did she meant by that but im afraid we may start quarrelling and now i dont want that. and im afraid i may cry or sth, yes thats how loser i am. but point is, its wrong of u to jump to comclusions just like that. u've known me for some time, do i look e kind that will do such things? and she said such stuff to my classmate right in front of me?! like wth?! just imagine, a scenario, when someone talked to ur friend about u with u there and u had to act like u didnt hear anything. can u be more sensitive?! even if im ur most hated person, thats not e way to do things. its time u stop ur da xiao jie jia zi okay? its not gonna work. one day u will lose all ur friends. people are disliking u ard, just that U DONT KNOW.

and worse, just when i thought things were over, she went to complain to jing han and da shen about it. i saw. dont think im blind. why? just cos i kept silent, that doesn mean im admitting it. i just CANT BE BOTHERED TO REASON WITH SOMEONE WHO INSISTS ON HER WAY. okay? yes silence DONT always mean consent. get it?

2006-06-20T09:18:00.000-07:00

I MISS LEOW ZHI XIAN THE ASS SHRUGGER.

hahah i really do, i dont know why. dont know since when i started hanging out with her, then slowly got influenced by her damn lian language, but dont worry i will never ever use it. anyway yeah hor, how did i start hanging out with her? ASS HOW AH! heh well ur e only reader of my blog i think, ass!

i miss her! hahaha ever since camp challenge? or e great date during which 1/3 people turned up. sounds okay right? well acty its only me and the ass! haha supp to be kevy, peiqi, yenlin, lynette, me and xian. yenlin got training i think, kevy not sure, lynette have to help xiner and peiqi have to prepare for her church thingy. so yeah left e both of us how ass is that!

but as long as its her, even if ur going out just with her, u will feel like u went out with 3 people? yeah abt there. shes funny (: haha i sound like im promoting her hor? not really, just tt really miss her lah. but shes e cause why i cant catch a movie! went shopping with her lah, but also damn fun. i think so far, shes e most enjoyable person to shop with. seriously, not too pressured, not too sian haha very fun!

ass ah ass, when can go out again? haha do i sound les? i realise my recent posts all really les hor? but no, im straight! (: i like kenny. and i think dao ming si/shi (i dont know lah) is quite hot. though right now i sound like a total typical singaporean lian who goes crushing boy bands, but i really have to admit he is hot. yes he is, as in his character, not him. haha digress so much. but basically i miss ass! e ass usual assfied assing assy 'ass'cited xian! e last word didnt make much sense but it definite sounds better than sexcited right? quoted from xian, ass expected. haha okay lah dont know how to end. just end lah. -shrugs- quoted from her, ass u can see.

2006-06-17T08:52:00.000-07:00

this is gonna be a total self centred entry, its gonna be all about me me and me so if ur tired of all this 'talking me me' then i suggest u dont go on reading.and i shall, in this entry, practise paragraphing me stuff, since xhin the ASS SHRUGGER says that its hard to read my entries in chunks and since shes one of my few readers, i shall take her comments seriously. (:

people change. okay abit the DUH, people of course change. especially from sec 2 to sec 3, somehow, maybe its cos its fromlower sec to upper sec, from lil freedom to more freedom, from girl to lady? well people start to be more look conscious, behavior conscious and blah blah. well my friends change, better of worse i dont know lah. i changed too, i know it, my friends tell me that too, yeah i did change,but thats not the point. the point is other people change! okay i dont see whats wrong with that. but e change in this certain someone is making me feel erm sad? disappointed? pissed? aiya dont know lah. i thought she didnt chnage at first, when everyone was changing. but haha i was so wrong.

thats why i say one must never be thankful or happy too fast, fate never made man happy. yes she didnt change, but now she is. at least to me. if u were to ask me how she has changed, i dont know too. its just e feeling's different now, she no longer seem close to me, nor is she e person i used to know. in fact, not only do i feel shes drifting apart from me, i dont like the present her. not cos shes not close to me or what, but well i like her for who she was, and who she is now sin't someone i can be really close with. i dont know lah but i will just blabber on.

she doesn know shes changing, no one ever know they're changing until people start telling them. and apparently im e only person who felt e change in her. maybe im too sensitive, its usually e case. but she just feels different.

after the hols, after not meeting up for so long, when i finally talked to her, she seemed diff. at first i thought its just that im pms-ing that day, and tt shes only crazy only for certain incident. but soon, after talking to her a few more times, reading her blog entries, somehow i sense sth diff. well e way she blog was perfectly fine, but its just tt instance when i feel like i dont know lah, funny i think. and when im talking to her, im like her sidekick? not really sidekick, but like her erm passe of sth. like e feeling is like, for example, i used to be like her good friend, but from e way shes talking to me now, its like now she has her own good friends ard, and im like her side friend? aiya its just a feeling i dont know how to say. im just like not that important anymore. she seems preoccupied by her own stuff, and im like this idiot watching her from behind or sth, not knowing anything cos duh she doesn tell me much like she used to anymore. or maybe she never did tell me much. i dont know. im really tempted to use i dor nor hhaha. xian u ass see lah!

OH MY GOD SO EMO. wth. but yeah whatever lah, blabbers are like that what. emo loh. -shrugs- quoted from zhi xian the ass shrugger. hmm do i sound les? overpossessive? over sensitive? emo? i think i do sound a lil gross and demanding. but hey its i talk u listen here. haha.

but well, im kinda glad in a bad way, tt i didnt go for the things tt noth of us would go and meet. not intentional of course. but its a blessing in disguise i think. i realy wouldn't know how to behave in front of her if i met her now. behave like nothing or what? dont know lah. see first lah, anyway hols still got one week haha yeah SHIT one week only. ah whatever lah.

i sound damn ass right? assified ass entry. ASS! ><

2006-06-15T06:56:00.000-07:00

I LOVE MY DAD. yes i do. hahaha this is such a great contrast from e other blog post. on the other hand, i think I LOVE MY MUM TOO. haha i have always loved them but after the chalet i was really touched by what they had done for me. really really.

it was actually a family chalet, something that my mum got for free from her company. we used to go there as a family which means : grandfather, grandmother, dad, mum, brother and me. yeah. but this time they asked my brother and i if we wanted to invite our friends. not just for the bbq but for the whole day if we wanted. of course we say yes lah. so i invited eileen, _____, ___ and ______ three people who cant be named cos they didnt wanted to lah. my dad is so nice pls! its like come on, its a family chalet, its supposed to be just us and yet he invited our friends, for the whole day! knowing that we would neglect them, he didnt mind.

and on tt day he really seriously left me with them for the whole day while we slacked and chatted, from time to time coming to us NOT TO DISTURB, but to OFFER FOOD AND DRINKS. but the point is he just left us to ourselves. wah piang he rocks lah. (((: when eileen came, he allowed us to stay at the chalet while he brought both my grandparents out alone with my mum for lunch. now its totally like my brother and his friends, me and my friends, then my parents and my granparents. yeah and he was really nice to eileen's dog. actually my mum was nice to her too. as in, i thought they wouldnt like animals but then they were so friendly to her! okay it sounds spastic but they're really really nice.

the bbq was the best. this kinda chalet, it shld be the kids doing the bbq-ing right, esp now when my friends are with me. but no, we stayed in the chalet e whole entire time while both of them bbqed the food outside. and they just kept coming in, bringing in more and more food and giving it to us and my brother those people lah. and they haven't eaten yet lah wth! he continued until all e food was done and when all of us got to eat then he started to eat. it was like quite late then. ahhhh they rock, my dad rocks! i dont know how to say but its like, he allowed my friends, togehter with one of their dogs to come, was super nice to them, left us alone while they spend their time either bringing my grandparents to lunch or busy going to cheers or whatever places to buy more food for the bbq, e whole entire time while we were enjoying, they were 'working'. and he gave me alot of moeny! its not cos of the money tts why i say he rocks, its e thought u know! but we didnt spend it at all. (:

and at the end of the day when i thanked him, he didnt like typical parents say welcome or act ego, he still asked 'so did u guys have fun? the food can not?' omg likehow u want me to reply him? its not just fun its touching lah! but of course i cant say that to him or the both of us will just puke. so i just told him yeah it was very fun, and he was like 'good good, what matters is u had fun' ahhhh touching touching touching. sorry for such an emo post but hey my parents are so nice! i mean seriously! wah lau and to think i treated them so mean at times, or neglect the and stuff. i better start being guai and make them happy (:

I LOVE MY DADDY (:

2006-06-10T10:00:00.000-07:00

wah i realise my post alot of grammar mistakes sia. haha randomness.

2006-06-10T09:08:00.000-07:00

shopping with mums just DON'T work. or maybe its just me shopping with my mum.
don't get me wrong, this isn't a baseless statement, i tried going out with her many times before, and each time i would end my shopping spree (it wasn't even a spree) either feeling pissed off or losing my mood for shopping. likewise, i would end it not being able to buy e things that i want. why? because there is a communication breakdown between e both of us. like da4 gou1 u know? yes, tts it.
i just don'get it, i doubt she does either. many of my friends' mums go shopping with them, they shop for e same things, have e same things and enjoy themselves together. they just shop! so of course seeing my friends like tt, i would like to try too what, like after all i have been treating her quite badly these days and she seems to be stinging on herself too much. and wouldn't it be nice if mother and daughter can go shopping together? e mum gets VALUABLE comments from e daughter on fashion, e daughter gets sponsorship for her items, what i call a mutual relationship. (: and according to my aunts, my mum USED to be quite a fashionable woman with good taste and high class clothes.
so yeah, i attempted shopping with her, but few, or maybe non, worked out. we'll just get pissed off by each other. don't ask me exactly what, cos if i knew, then all these wouldn't have happened. its just tt we can't communicate. i can't stand e way she does things, she can't stand e way i done mine. so yeah conflict lah. but one thing i really dislike is her attitude. i often hear of daughters having attitude problem, but mums having attitude problem would be e first. and sadly, it has to be my mum. okay so today, i attempted once again to go shopping with her cos kok couldn't make it so i had no one to go shopping with. and e lime flea market (yes im cheapskate) is today, and i had never been to one before so i thought of just going to see see lah. so i asked her along. and the story goes:
we reached e lime flea market and e first thing she said already sets e mood off. 'no earrings ah, i tell u first'
okay fine understandable, cos u wouldn't know whether they have been worn before. so okay i didnt mind. then we went there, looked around at stuff. fyi, it was ard 6 then and e flea market started at 1, so e shops then were all cutting down on e prices and were ready to pack up.

okay piss me off incident number 1
we came by this stall, and e stall owner was quite friendly. she showed us some necklaces and stuff. and then i picked a few and my mum had to be kpo and start wearing them on for me. okay tt was fine but then she held them on with her hand (means she didnt really clip it on for me) then she stared at it and stone. when i was done looking at it, her hand was still there, stoning. then its like i tried to take it off, her hand stayed there, till i had to 'mummy can u take it off?' and i had to pull her hand off before she realised i was talking to her. and then she had to keep trying 2 necklaces on and off again and again on me a few times when i ard had seen enough of it. i just needed time to think what i wanted right. then shes like 'come put it on'. right now, can u picture this ah ma trying to make her granddaughter wear a dress for chinese new year? yes tt was exactly how i felt.

piss me off incident number 2:
i decided to take both necklaces, and both cost 11 bucks altogether. e lady was nice and she said 10. my mum wanted 9. not tt u shldn't bargain, u can, but hello for 1 buck? and then e lady said very very nicely tt no cant cos its very low already and even attemtped explaining to her. my mum insisted on 9! and all e time i was standing there like a total idiot. then in e end my mum said 'okay 9.50' o.O wah u like tt also shaung lah! save 50 cents she also happy. wth.

piss me off incident number 3:
we walked on and came across a few stalls, and surprisingly at this time of e day e stall owners were still friendly and nice. so they kept telling us e discounts and items worth buying and blah blah. so since they are friendly to u, its only decent to be friendly back. or just say yeah or nod would be fine. i mean like, people ard so nice to u, will it kill to be nice back? why? just cos ur e customer, ur damn big ah? no right! then act what seh. she just daod them with this straight sulky face like they owe her money and went 'umm umm'. wth! there was once e lady asked her qsns like 'what abt this?' and she literally daoed her. wth, will it kill to just reply?! this is not e only time, i swear, everytime i go out with her, just bcos e shop keepers start to promote their items, she will give them tt attitude and feel irritated. like hello, they're shop keepers for a reason, they're supposed to sell their stuff. is there anything wrong to recommend stuff to u? act pissed for what.

piss me of incident 4:
this is e ultimate. we went to this stall set up by a few chio looking young girls, but they were nice haha unexpected. girls their looks seemed to be those glam people. but they were nice enough to promote their stuff and blah blah. okay tts not e point. point is, i saw this necklace tt was not bad, and its selling at 5 bucks. e original price would have at least been 15 plus but since its second hand, its cheap. but hey i don't mind, i no money what. after all, if i had bought new stuff, they would have been spoilt sooner or later by me too. so i showed my mum and then she had to examine it as usual. and she claimed e chain looked abit 'tarnish'. well it is but only abit. BUT, if u can't stand ur dear daughter wearing tarnished stuff, fine i don't buy lah. but she insisted in telling e stall owner tt it is tarnished

her: sorry, this chain is a lil tarnished
girl: oh, no its ard like tt when i bought it
her: no lah, its tarnished, cant be like tt
girl: no leh, its like tt when i bought it
her: no lah its tarnished im sure

okay in e first place, whats wrong with it being tarnished? its second hand after all. secondly, whats e point in telling her its tarnished? it u don't like it then don't buy lah, not like people force u to buy, i ard told her i dont mind. and like what can she do if u told her its tarnished? not like she can make it new again right? so yeah, whats ur point? and lastly, whats ur ass point of trying to prove to her its tarnished? i mean, of course she would deny tt its tarnished, no stall owner would put down their goods right. besides, u will never win, unless u decide to bring e necklace for some chemical experiments to detect rust or sth. so why bother to argue with her? does she have a hatred for young teens/girls or what? why is she always picking on them? last time i went to buy clothes with her also like tt. she insisted on asking why e nets card (im not sure what) didnt provide her with a receipt when e lady ard told her tt e machine is spoilt so cant print receipt. whether if e lady is lying anot, who cares? not like u can do anything to get e receipt. why carry on asking? u see, mums, they just want their way. once they see young teenage girls, they will think they're ignorant, naive and tt they themselves are always right. so they would argue all e way till they win.
and these are just some incidents tt i recall today tt she pissed me off with. there are still many more, basically small actions and words tt really pissed me. i cant rmb and definitely would not try to narrate it out or i would might as well just video it down and let u see e whole process. and fyi, we were shopping from 6 to 630 and yes half an hour. within half an hour she managed to piss me off with so many things and spoil my whole mood for shopping.
wth, i have tried shopping with her many many times, but none worked out. and today she pissed me off real bad. maybe u may not think it sounds tt bad cos as u know my narrative skills suck. but basically yeah, e first thing i cant stand is her rudeness or attitude towards shop keepers, she thniks shes so darn smart. then shes kiasu, she tries things on me again and again and hello, she bargains for prices in places like far east shops?! like tt kind of places can bargain one ah? ur not in people's park u know. aiya whatever it is, shopping with her just sucks. i would never ever shop with her again. worse to worse i go shop myself, pathetic yes, but at least i get to SHOP.

im sorry lah, if u think this is a total self centred entry but hey i need somewhere to release my anger kay? i cant even tell her what im unhappy with, she never listens, she'll just put me down with her explanations and philosophies of life. 'ahh... u think u very smart lah, i tell u e world is not so simple okay, u think ur so smart, okay next time see what happen to u' and this would be said in a super suanning, challenging and underestimating way tt u would love to land ur hand on her face. yes its tt bad.

therefore, i hereby conclude tt i can never shop with her. never.

2006-03-22T05:43:00.000-08:00

thanks to peiqi, yes here it is, all the seven blahs.

seven random facts about me
1. i am not bimbo (yes)
2. i just got a new blog (: random enough?
3. i can't live without a day of msn
4. i love my blog!
5. i miss yuyang :(
6. i am tall! just that others are taller ><
7. i just bought a chio bag today!

seven celebrity crushes
1. HONG YUYANG ((: peiqi hes mine.
2. elvin ng!
3. wang li hong
4. shawn lee! though hes erm a lil beng?
5. dont know
6. dont know
7. dont know

Seven qualities I want in a potential boyfriend/girlfriend:
1. cute! decent looking
2. caring
3. funny!
4. funky
5. not flirt? (duh!)
6. same age or other than me
7. can tolerate me being a total idiot

Seven things that scare me:
1. dark
2. ghosts (omg im such a loser)
3. death
4. loss of anything
5. failure?
6. disgusting insects
7. rumours

Seven random songs at the moment:
1. feng! my dear yuyang!
2. truly madly deeply
3. jia gei wo
4. jiu shi ai ni
5. mo ri zi lian
6. now that she's gone
7. sorry seems to be the hardest word

Seven things I like the most:
1. slacking
2. listening to music
3. chatting online
4. sleep
5. eat
6. life
7. everyone i love

Seven things I plan to do before I die:
1. find an ideal perfect earing for my 2nd earhole
2. find an ideal perfect bag
3. find an ideal perfect wallet
4. travel round the world
5. do something great
6. get a cute/shuai boyfriend! (can lah, since opposites attract)
7. slap renfred till i happy

Seven things I say the most:
1. oh man
2. oh my god
3. shit
4. wah lau
5. wah piang
6. girlfriend!
7. qing ai de!

(im such a boring person)

seven people i want to do this too:
1. yeo hui wen! haha good way to update ur blog!
2. yunting
3. yuyang! (if only he would read this)
4. ying ching!
5. kok!
6. ame!
7.whoever wants to do then do lah

2006-03-21T00:14:00.000-08:00

okay after a looong post on ps convention, im proud to say im proceeding to my third post for this new blog! right now, it is 4 14pm and i am watching the repeat of campus superstar and its currently renfred's performance. i am sorry but yes after listening to him singing again, i have to say that HE CANNOT SING. okay most of his fans reading this right now (if there is) would be thinking, 'if you so smart, then you go sing ah!' yes i can't sing, but that doesn't mean i can't criticise him right. well if you have to be better than that person to be able to criticise him, then ahah! this world would be a miserable place to live in. you won't be able to laugh at how 'not pretty' miss singapore universe contestants are these days if ur a guy, u wont be able to criticise participants from shows like 'america's next top model' and stuff. so come on, just because you may not be able to sing or act doesn't mean u can't tell whats good singing from bad right! yes so RENFRED SUCKS. and now its zhiyang singing. okay this is what i call standard. even if you're renfred's fan, come on, you can really hear the difference. whos better and whos not. okay back to topic. okay i would really like to talk about this thing about talent shows like star idol and campus superstar where the winner is chosen mostly based on the number or viewer votes and not by their talent. okay most of you would say 'being a star not only requires talent, but popularity as well. so whats the point of having a winner who has got talent but no one likes him?' yes thats true, a star needs to be popular. yeah there you go, so shouldn't everyone be limited to one vote each to vote for their favourite participant? this would truly reflect how many people likes him. now you also could say 'but being able to vote as many times as we like also shows how much we like him. if people like him alot, people will be willing to vote more for him, so this voting system is fair because it reflects how much people love him'. okay reasonable but how do u define 'how much u love him'? lets say, if i am this poor girl who has 10 bucks a week for my allowance but im willing to spend all 10 bucks on voting for my favourite contestant; compared to a girl who has 1000 bucks a week for allowance and spends 100 bucks to vote for her favourite idol, okay so who likes their favourite contestant more? the richer girl may have spent 100 bucks voting compared to me who spends 10 bucks but hello i used all my money, its just that my limits aren't as much as hers. so what do u say then? which of the two participants deserve to be the winner then? thats why, i think this issue is something worth thinking about. how do u define the winner? one with talent? most number of people supporting? or most number of votes they get? well nothing's ever fair that i have to agree and im not here to act as miss smartypants and give u guys a solution to this problem. no thanks im not that smart. in fact such problems are inevitable. but what i wanna say is that being fans, u should know the limits of your favourite. yes u like him, u want him in, thats why u vote alot for him but after all its called the campus superstar and the competition's about singing, not about WHO HAS THE RICHEST FANS. get it? well obviously, look at shows like campus superstar and star idol, you will know what i mean. renfred, oh my god for goodness sake, i dont even know how he got into the top 20, unless the singing standard among singaporean teens are THAT BAD. okay fine he got in, great. but come on, given his standard, if this competition was based purely on judges comments, he would have long gotten out. okay maybe u think we should give him a chance to prove himself thats why u vote for him to let him stay on in the competition. but hello! arent' enough chances given to him already? hello, it is a competitive world out there dudes, u gotta be fast and efficient to be able to keep up with the pace of progression. yes thats reality, cold harsh reality,so yes u have to accept it. not that im being too realistic but come on u get what i mean right? then what, u want all of the viewers to wait for dear little renfred to hatch and pop out of his egg shell like a dumb little chick? even a chick struggles to come out and learns to stand on its own. renfred? no, he basically goes on to the stage, dance some spastic dance moves, opene his mouth make some noise then wait for his dear rich dad to vote and get him through. okay i may sound a little mean, haha but im blunt, thats why i stopped blogging last time. but u see, im just expressing my views, be glad that i didnt use profanities. but if you still dont like what i said or the way i express myself, then TOO BAD. this is my blog, I TALK YOU LISTEN. yes when it comes to renfred, i have ap. people got the voice, they got the talent, well in this case, renfred's got the money. and next is star idol, gosh, i think even the ex superstar contestants acting in the chinese drama serial now can act much better than those two u see at the finals of star idol. bryan, our first ever star idol, knows nothing about facial expression except about moving his eyebrows did u realise? he's stiff and can't act, thats like a fact. okay he has improved, that i must admit, he did improve but surely he shouldn't be the winner of singapore's star idol. so why did he get in? well he got looks. ahah. looks! well if thats the case, why can't he go sign up for some male pageant instead? hes here to act hello, not to show his GORGEOUS face in front of the tv. yes looks do matter alot, they form first impressions. but looks are after all an extra something that god has given us. looks come from birth, u can't gain from it unless u go for plastic surgery lah. so why vote and favour him just because he has those extra bod and looks? why not consider people who can act but too bad doesn't have the honour to get such looks. hmm think about it. and to think that channel 8 made star idol finals such a great thing and even invited a famous taiwan actor as one of the judges. i think he must be shocked to see the standard of the two contestants. h,, don't u think so? please agree with me. but at least bryan is trying, we can all see his efforts, he did put in an effort to improve his acting. and like what some of my friends say, 'well he can't act but at least he got the looks' then hello, look at renfred! haha! does he have anything else to compensate his lack of a singing ability? hmm his dance? maybe not. well he's just lucky i guess. hey, im not being sore here, just because he kicked out my favourite contestants like yinwei, yuyang and adriano. if so, why can't i blame the other contestants. because he really can't sing. there's no other reason. so i sometimes do wonder if such shows are really after all that an accurate way of recognition of the talented or just a source of earning extra money. but yes like i said, cold harsh reality (: haha so primary school compo. yes. okay thats for now. bye!

2006-03-20T06:56:00.000-08:00

hello again. being super enthusiastic about the revival of my new blog (wait there cant be revival if its new), i shall start blogging now. like now. yes okay starting with ps convention! yes i know i said i wont narrate my day but i did say i will if the event is significant. and yes convention to me is significant, at least well after i've experienced it i realised it was. hmm well convention was on the 14th and 15th of march, so blogging about it now is a little too late but hey this blog was just created today dudes!
okay so allow me to start. hmm okay so after almost 2 months of planning and stuff, getting pissed off and worried to feeling relieved and accomplished, convention was finally here. on the first day i was kinda dead, because yuyang got out of campus superstar. and guess what? yes renfred's still in. okay i shant insult renfred anymore before my newly created blog turns into a battlefield between his fans and me and gets flooded with swear words. no no. peace okay! er okay maybe not. hahaha er teenage harmony? okay maybe not too. okay tts not the point. yes back to what i was saying. yes and i arrived in school, stoned around then when the people start coming in, i joined my group, MCKINLEY. yes let me hear you say u love it. yes and of course my dear girlfriend, NATTAY, (i must caps her name u know)is in my group. yeah so er play games, intro, more games, then lunch (thats when i received my first present! :D) then talks. yes the talks. well i think mr glenn lim (thats his name right?) was quite inspiring, though half the time people was staring at him rather than listening to what he has to say. well thats why he was asked to take on the inspire training right! haha. then he showed us a video, gave us his cds for free and yeah told us how we could contact him. his whole family came i think, well at least to me i thought those people who came with him are his familly members. his son was. okay great kok just told me on msn that adriano is out. wth thanks alot. he got 30/40 and renfred got 26.5 yet renfred got in. why? because his dad is rich, like filthy rich?okay now i know what issue i can blog about already.great i lost my mood for convention. yeah so im just gonna skimp through whatever that happened. okay then uncle david came, talked, laughed, (mainly laughed), brought us on tours all over the world, smiled like a chee-ko-pek and erm yeah basically talk about stuff about aspire. hes a great bubbly guy. sorry i lost e mood. yes then next we sang songs, went high and that concludes the end of day 1 convention. then charlene, nat, chee and i went to far east kfc. ate food, yes im having ap now dont mind me, then talked. then they started to 'shoot' crushed ice out of their straws and till this day i havent mastered the skill of shooting yet. the ice either doesn come out or it comes out then drops downwards. no chance of flying. yes. then we followed nat to isetan where she bought breakfast for her family. then nat asked me go toilet (u'll know why later) so i stupidly obeyed. okay heres the dumb part. charlene and i were walking into the toilet, er to use the toilet. yes. so we walked in slowly, looked at each cubicle then charlene complained that there were no toilet rolls and then she went into the second last cubicle i think. yes nothing right? so i walked further down and whats left is the last cubicle. so being the scared of everything loser, i looked whats after the last cubicle, which means what is on the other side after the last cubicle, in case if its some dark corners and some head will pop out at the side of the wall while im relieving myself. yes so i looked whats beside, then i saw many MANY urinals, i repeat yes nice clean urinals. hmm i dont know why so dont ask me why, i didnt find anything wrong so i was about to go in when hey URINALS?! so i asked charlene about it and she said its for BABIES. right lah, like got so many babies use the toilet like that, or like babies use urinals. but anyway i heard it as her saying that the toilet may be unisex. well there are such toilets right! but i still feel odd so i ran to the door and looked at the sign. wow great, its the GENTS! so what am i, peeping tam? sorry i sound really pissed cos i am. renfred. so charlene and i rushed out and acted like nothing happened and went to the ladies. hmm imagine what we have to say if we went in and some guy was using the urinal. 'oh sorry, e guy figure on the door looked like he got long hair' okay thats lame. but u cant really blame us, the toilet's pink! blame the toilet designer. yes so end of day 1.

day 2
i went to school early because logs comm was supposed to reach at around 6 45. yeah so as usual, prepared stuff, got a birthday surprise from log comm, yayness, then went on to do work. oh then comes STATON games. it was quite fun, as in to be a station mistress but i think it would be more fun if i was with mckinley playing the stations. yes but still fun yeah, except for the last part where everyone was in the field splashing water at each other, wild wild wet! yes twin and i were stoning at my station and from time to time carrying table and chairs twice our size up and down from basement to the hall. muscles eh? no. haha we are the outcast. yes then next was lunch and i got another surprise! i was still multitasking, half chewing my food and half talking to my junior when twin pounced onto me. yes then nat appeared and slowly rg psls started coming to my table singing the bday song! hahaha great surprise but sorry i was still chewing on my food. i almost choked when the whole group of them came over. so i was basically half smiling and talking, half trying to chew and force my food down but unfortunately it got stuck. haha apparently, when nat aske me to go to the toilet with charlene yesterday she went to buy a cake! (: see? it pays to treat ur girlfriend nice, u get surprises! okay next erm, yes trainings, hahaha i wasn't really listening but i did try! yes then next break then talentime! ahhaa mackinley didnt win top 3 but i thought it still rocked! cos its gay! yes then after that we went back to the CLC for song singing and stuff. did the secret message thingy, handed out souvenirs and sang songs again! everybody was exceptionally high that day, cause its the last few moments we will spend together. its only been 2 days but the fun we had was definitely great. but then we got too high, we started running and stuff and tammy got injured. yeah so i tried to go out and see lah but no, not nice to go and crowd around her. so yeah, also a good thing that i didnt go out, or the main highlight of the day would be destroyed. after some time, when all of us were back singing songs and stuff, mr chu came in and said that a group of girls needed to make a special announcement. most of us thought something bad happened to tammy, like her injury got worse or something, cos jia cong was walking back in when tammy was slowly walking off. yeah so when i was still busy looking out, yenline came and wah damn serious 'weiting, ur parents outside, come out' wah give me a fright, i thought they got angry that convention ended late and barged to my school. then i was dragged out and there in front of me, some of my best friends in 209 and 305, eileen huiwen yingching and kok. haha not that i wanna show off or something, but these people needed some recognition. they were the first people in my life history to make me cry on my bday. haha they were carrying this 'grow' milk powder tin with a candle on top. haha get the hint (grow) yes mean but yeah thats them! okay of course being a born loser, i cried. never once in my entire big fat life that i get to experience so many surprises on my bday, as in since young, my bdays were planned (yes spoilt brat). and that day, my 15th bday, surprises came one after another. and lastly, at 8 30 pm on a wednesday of the march holidays, when the only people in school were the psls, my friends bothered to come to school to celebrate my bday with me, just when i thought it was late and everything was about to end. yes they appeared. haha it was them who twitched my last strain of tolerance of tears. yes.its not the song they sing nor the presents they give that touched me, it was their lil action of celebrating my bday and how it matter to them that made me break down and cry like i got too much tears to spare. okay i sound like im showing off. maybe, maybe not. but im truly truly touched by their actions. haha guys if ur reading this (most likely not, no one will still be reading by now) thank you so much for whatever u've done for me and that im truly touched and grateful for everything and yes i do love u guys! thanks for being there for me when i needed help, when im down and needed someone to lean on. thanks for being there for me (: haha cheesy right? but yeah since when heartfelt words weren't cheesy? yeah so after that convention ended with a bang, we packed, cheered (vs cheer was erm LOUD) and then left for marche for dinner. yes my greatest bday ever spent.
convention was meaningful, at the end of the two days, after 2 months of preparation, it definitely feels good to see it end with a success. and through this haha i learnt that friends arent just people that come and go in your life that u meet and talk to. friends are a part of u and are the last people to leave u alond in this world apart from ur family. yes sounds cliched right but cliched stuff are sometimes true. yes food for thought (did i use the correct phrase) paidoff hardwork, friendship, taste of happiness and just the thrilling feeling of erm being loved, yes i experienced it all. and thats what makes convention so special and significant to me.
and if ten years down the road someone were to ask me how was convention, i would reply them with one word- 'unforgettable' <3

6th RGS PS convention 2006
co-organised with VS
experience it (:

2006-03-20T06:40:00.000-08:00

okay hello! sheesh i cant start. okay well after stopping to blog for about 10 months, i suddenly decided to blog again. (: happy? okay happy. yes okay basically this blog wont be a blog where i narrate my day like i used to, unless it is a significant event. yeah so blogging here would be quite seldom, i only blog when i need to, to express my views or talk about some issues. yeah kinda boring. but like my blog add suggests :i talk you listen. yes thanks. okay i may sound like i got ap, well maybe i have but haha! this is my blog, so once again I TALK U LISTEN. as u can see, not much effort is being put into this blog, i just need a place to blog, theres no need for a chio blog add and pretty blog skin. i even wanted to use blog.blogspot.com but sadly some other boring person somewhere out there like me has taken it. note that i try not to use lian words like 'sian'. yes because im anti lian. not that im much better but i will try to refrain from lian words. yes. okay so now u see why i need a blog. i got nowhere to talk to myself. so there u go, a simple introduction that went too long. okay will blog soon, i hope. till then bye.

(gosh i do sound boring dont i?)